Ulquiorra & Stark

Now I understand why I like Ulquiorra and Stark the most among the 10 Espadas...
Because they represent "Emptiness" and "Solitude".
And these two words pretty much describe me.

This holiday has made me feel that I'm further away from my friends.
The distance between us grew.
Well, I can't blame them for that.
They have their own lives to live.
So... I should get a life too.
A life without them in it would be the best to keep me away from those two words.

There's a special complement for a certain someone.
I love the way you lie.

Untitled 12

I've lived almost 18 years now.
But I still don't act like 18 years old, more like an 8 years old...

Some people call their friends "brothers" and "sisters".
What does it actually mean?
From my experience, it doesn't mean anything.
You're neither closer to them than friends nor family.
You're just like everybody else.
It's just a name to call people.

I called them "jiejie", act cute a little...
Thinking that might get a bit of their attention.
Don't you think this very thought is childish?
Yes, I AM childish.
I'm just a kid who doesn't learn, doesn't grow up.
Getting their attention?
What the hell?
Who would ever put their attention on someone like me?
It was always been me.
I'm the one who talk to them, sms them.
And what is the common thing you see here?
What word appears in your mind?
"DISTURBED" <-- that's what appeared.
Try putting that into the sentence again.
"I'm the one who DISTURBED them."

Wai Loon, I know you thought about it, but... THINK HARDER~
And don't just think about stop disturbing them, DO IT!!!
Don't ever say try...
DO or DO NOT, there is no try.
Grow up dude, this is your fate.
Capricorn is born like that, face it...

I'm not ready...

That day, I told her the truth...
I can feel the pain after her reply.
I was upset for a few days.
But after that, I feel normal...
Am I numbed by the pain?
Or I've never truly liked her before?
I don't know...
People often say "listen to your heart"...
What I hear is bip bop bip bop =.=
But I definitely don't like to see her with other guys.

Lately, I've thought about it a lot...
Perhaps I'm not ready for a relationship yet.
I'm still a kid.
I'm still immature.
I'm still incapable of taking care of myself, let alone taking care of her.
I don't have the ability to fulfill her needs.
Perhaps I'm really not ready for this.

Relationship is a complicated thing.
I'm still too young to understand that.
And I'm not smart enough to understand that.
Perhaps time will be willing to sacrifice itself to teach me.
Until it thinks that I'm ready...